I have road rage. Not to the point where I’m going to try to drive someone off the road. But I get really, really, REALLY mad at people when driving. So here’s a list of things that you shouldn’t do when you drive your car in no particular order other than when I think of them. Because if you do, you’re stupid.
1. People who jump lanes at the last second.
I CANNOT STAND PEOPLE WHO DO THIS! Why? That’s all I want to know. Why do you do that? If you know you are going to need to turn left, then why are you in the right or middle lane? Why not be driving in the left lane? No, instead people constantly, CONSTANTLY, wait until the very street they need to turn on, then they slide barely through cars and jump into the left turn lane and turn. I do not understand it. Why do that? Just stay in the lane you need to be in. Why push your way through cars, disrupting the flow of traffic? I’ve seen more accidents caused by these kinds of people than anything else, I think. Because you cause everyone to slam on their breaks, then you turn and people rear-end each other and you get off scott-free. I really don’t like you.
2. People who don’t know how to get into the turn lane.
Once again, why? There are two types of this form: 1) those who break twenty feet away from the turn lane and then get into it when they finally reach it and 2) those who wait until the last possible second to get into the turn lane. I guess #2 goes hand in hand with #1. Turn lanes are a certain length for a reason. Get into them and then start breaking and you will be just fine. Don’t wait until you have just two feet left of the lane and then get into it and turn. AND don’t get into the middle lane and ride it for 30 feet until you turn. You stop people from being able to turn into the right parking lot because you’re driving down the wrong lane.
3. Excessive breakers.
Those people who start breaking 30 feet BEFORE the suggested break time. I can’t take watching the red break lights flash over and over for five minutes before you stop.
If you ride my tail, I will consistently slow down. I won’t break quickly because you’re probably stupid anyway and will rear-end me so instead I will promptly lift my foot off the gas pedal and slow down and down and down and will not press it again until you pass me.
5. Getting in front of me and then going slow.
Okay, so you felt like you had to get in front of me but then you’re going to go ten miles under the speed limit. I don’t get it. Why do that?
6. People going 10 miles under the speed limit.
GO THE STINKING SPEED LIMIT! It’s there for a reason. Why not go as fast you’re allowed?
7. Those people who make their own lanes on the freeway.
You know when you’re stuck in traffic on the freeway? There is ALWAYS those stupid people who think they’re better than everyone else and instead of waiting like everyone else has to, they drive down the shoulder then cut someone off to get back into a legal lane. I wish every single one of those peoples’ tires gets flattened. Every single tire. Flattened. They don’t deserve them.
8. Those people who turn across your lane prematurely and make you slam on the breaks when there is NO ONE behind you.
So someone from the opposite side of the street is turning into a neighborhood and must cross your lanes in order to do that. No big deal. Until they suddenly no longer have a thinking brain and they turn when you’re within 10 feet of them and you have to slam on your breaks or hit them. And they always seem to do this when there is NOT A SINGLE PERSON BEHIND YOU. Again: why? When there is nobody behind me why do you feel like you have to turn and make me slow down for you when you could wait another 10 seconds and turn without a problem.
9. Those people who take your turn at four-way stops.
I hate those people. You are not better than I am. Your time is not better than my time. And just because you’re a guy doesn’t mean you get to go before me. They know it’s not their turn. They know it. And they go anyway and cut people off because they’re selfish and stupid. They shouldn’t be allowed to drive.
Okay, that is the end of my diatribe about stupid people driving. I know I am not the only one who thinks these things. And ultimately, people do these things because they are selfish and think that their time is more important than anybody else’s or that they should be allowed to do what no one else can. That’s really the bottom line. Or they’re just really stupid. One of those.